Re: I Miss You (Remus, R)

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:00 am

He kissed her back, hard as his claws settled back into his hands with an ache. He grunted softly as his body relaxed from his latest bought of wolfing out. "I'm going to get cleaned up" he murmured to her and nipped at her nose before ordering the bartender to give his wife whatever she wanted.

Turning, his eyes settled on the blood on the floor, the body, now mutilated beyond recognition looked almost famillar. His head twinged with pain and his vision blurred, for a moment the room went silent and the body wasn't the idiot he had killed anymore. It was Sirius, blood was caked in his long dark hair, his scarred face was slack in the throws of death and his eyes were dull, looking at him almost accusingly. As if to ask, "Why remus?"

Remus swayed, swallowing hard he blinked and the body changed, it was no longer Sirius, it was Teddy, his soft blue hair dyed red with blood, his little body broken, his dead eyes looking up at him asking "Why daddy?"

With a jerk Remus gasped "No!" he shouted and lunged, the hallucination faded and all that there was, was the patrons of the bar, he turned and saw his wife right where he left her, perched like a queen by the bar. Shaking his head he turned and rushed off to the bathroom, locking the door behind him he turned the water on the sink and began scrubbing the blood off his muscular arms. His head hurt horribly and he swore under his breath, looking into the mirror he heard in his head "its only a matter of time, he's a monster sirius he'll kill the people he cares for" swearing he growled "Shut up james..just shut up".

The head aches had been coming for months now, worsening each time, but he didnt speak a word to anyone, he was Remus Lupin, he was the hybrid and husband of the darkest witch in bohemia. He wasn't about to express any form of weakness.

Drying off he walked back out into the bar, with a flick of his wrist the body flew into the fireplace and the flames roared and glowed green. With a quick 'episkey' the blood was gone and he turned to morana with a small smile.

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:07 am

Morana gave Remus a smile before turning her attention to the bar, but it did not stay there long. Her vampire ears could hardly ignore her husband's words followed by his disappearance in the bathroom. She tried to hear through the crowds but it was hard to focus and yet play undistracted in the same time, so she gave up after a while and hid her worry beneath the perfect mask she built over the years. As Remus came back, she could tell something was wrong and she was not going to let that go. Remus knew her well enough to know this little misadventure probably escaped everyone in the room, but her. She ordered two shots for them and left the money on the counter. "To your victory, my wolf," she said, handing him the finest slivovitz. She drank hers and with graceful steps of an angel, she walked out of the bar door, waiting for him to follow.

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:12 am

He chuckled for a moment letting himself focus on her, her pale bloody smile and her deep eyes that sometimes scared so many but he had fallen in love with. Taking the drink he knocked it back, as she sauntered out of the bar he raised a brow and followed her. "Where too next darling?" he asked sliding an arm around her waist.

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:15 am

"Home," she replied seriously as she apparated them into their chambers before turning to him, concern in her voice. "What happened there?" she asked, taking off her sunglasses. "You cannot possibly think I missed that," she added.

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:17 am

With surprise he felt the jerk as she apparated them back to there home, taking a step back he shrugged out of his coat "Nothing Love, just tired"

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:23 am

Morana sighed with disappointment before she took his face in her hands, forcing him to look in her eyes. "Five decades, Remus. I haven't spent this much time with anyone. Not even my kids, my twin sister, Barty, anyone. I am not stupid, I know when you are tired. This is not you just tired," she told him, but there was no anger in her voice, just pure concern. "I am your wife. Who else can you talk to, if not me?"

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:28 am

Looking down at her he sighed heavily before sitting down. "Just hallucinating..a little" he said in a low growl "i went to a werewolf healer, and its all in my head..i dont know.."

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:39 am

"Except, you are not a werewolf anymore," Morana pointed out sitting on the bed. "I would know, since I doubt your body would be this... gorgeous in age of 90, if you were," she added. "What are you seeing, Remus?" she asked on a serious note.

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:41 am

He shot her a smile before running a hand through his hair, "everyone" he admitted "everyone i've ever loved, dead, looking at me, blaming me, i hear different people calling me a monster, i feel myself lose control more and more every time i shift, i used to be a good man. i dont know how i fell so far"

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 1:50 am

Morana looked down. It was not like she never had nightmares, like the evil she did never haunted her. But it was usually only on her sleep. If at all. She could hide that so easily. "Me," she said. "You fell, because of me," she explained. "But none of the people you loved and cared for died because of that," she added as she stood up. "I took you down that path with me. It was me, thanks to whom James died thinking you turned on him. It was me who was not there when Sirius needed to be saved despite of how much I knew you and Marvolo care. Don't even let me start of Sophia," she continued, unsure of why exactly was she saying these things. She remembered back in the day, when his parents died, how she was ready to take the blame for all of it, let him kill her. They were just kids back than. She was to marry Barty. And yet, maybe even back than, she felt something for Remus. He was her best friend. Maybe if he could be angry at her, hate her even, maybe he will feel better. Maybe.

by **Remus Lupin** Mon Feb 08, 2016 2:01 am

"no my love" he said reaching to run a hand through her hair "i began to turn long before i met you, before i forgave you and we re-connected i was already down a dark path. Morgan was threatening to leave me, i was lostand everyone around me didnt understand the monster i was becomming. If anything you saved me"

by **Morana Gaunt** Mon Feb 08, 2016 2:05 am

She looked at him in slight disbelief. He would never let her take the blame. It shocked her. Partly because she was not used to this kindness from people. Not even after half a century by his side. "You are a lot of things, Remus Lupin. But monster is not one of them," she said stroking his cheek. "Monsters don't regret, they don't have hallucinations, nightmares or feelings of sorrow. I would know. I am one," she added, kissing him gently. "You are a victim of really bad consequences happening. But none of it is on you. Neither the dead, nor your first wife."

by **Remus Lupin** Tue Feb 09, 2016 12:24 am

Leaning his forhead against hers, he let his eyes close as he brought a hand to her gair. "No, your no monster, misunderstood, aggressive, deadly but not a monster"

by **Morana Gaunt** Tue Feb 09, 2016 12:45 am

"Misunderstood?" she asked with hint of amusement. No one ever really considered her misunderstood. But then again, if not Remus, who would give her benefit of the doubt. "You have to let go. Ask Marvolo for the ressurection stone ring. Maybe you and your friends need some chit chat. And then let go. You cannot fix the past," she kissed him gently.

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