A Drop in the Ocean (Elysium, Harlyn)

[James Orion Lupin]

James was chatting away with Elysium, who had fast become his best friend because his notebook had more information about her than anyone else. He still needed to stop and read it every now and then while they talked, because he would forget if they'd covered a topic before, or he would add something to it, but he was able to at least have a somewhat normal conversation with her. He'd just finished his last class of the day, and Elysium had met him at the door, with notes that very much surpassed his own. They were probably going to end up taking a walk somewhere, or perhaps she would lead him to the library and then disappear to meet up with one of her friends for a while. He sometimes felt bad, especially when the likes of Antares Malfoy would give him a hostile glare from a distance, as she was right then. He only knew who she was because after what he was told to be the sixth time she had thrown him a tasteless remark, Elysium had given him a photograph to add to his notebook, the blonde in it having a much kinder look on her face than the one she gave him.

He paused their conversation to mutter, "your friend is glaring at me again." He had turned to look at Elysium as he said so. The Slytherin reached out and grabbed his arm firmly, stopping him from walking so that he didn't run into a girl, who was trying to cut across the corridor as he veered into her path because he wasn't focusing on where he was walking. "What?" he asked, his gaze moving from Elysium to the girl. He could only see the side of her head as he said sheepishly, "oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention."

[Harlyn Falkov]

Elysium spoke quite freely with James, feeling comfortable in the person's presence. Mainly because she knew he'd forget her softer moments as whenever he tried to write their topic down, she distracted him. Her kinder self was something she tried to hide. Glancing away from James, her eyes skimmed across Antares and she raised her eyebrow. "Apologies, James. I cannot stop her. Malfoys. Stubborn fucks." Elysium muttered the last part to herself with a roll of her eyes, her hand reaching out to grab James as he was about to walk into someone.

~~

Harlyn held her books to her chest, her brown hair covering most of her face and she could hear people talking, her paranoia making her believe it was about her but she shrugged it aside. She went to cut across the corridor which led to a bench that overlooked the lake but skidded to a halt as a familiar voice met her ears. "James..." She whispered softly, not wanting to look at the Lion but she did so anyway, slowly tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I-It's alright, James." His name rolled off her tongue with ease.

[James Orion Lupin]

James chuckled at the way that Elysium spoke of the Ravenclaw girl. He knew what the term ‘Malfoys’ meant, as it was something that he had heard about before he had lost his memories. Of course, those comments had been about different Malfoys, who he believed to be the girl’s father and grandfather. “Why doesn’t she like me, anyway?” he asked. While there were a few examples of when she'd said things to him in the notebook, there was no reason for her hostility given.

He eyed the girl’s dark hair, tilting his head as he waited for her to say something. He heard a whispered, though he couldn’t quite make out what it was. Then the girl turned to face him and after a moment he froze. Slowly, his eyes narrowed curiously and he opened his mouth a couple of times to speak. But he couldn’t. When sound finally left his mouth, he was cutting of Elysium. “Harlyn?” he said quietly, wracking his mind as he tried to find an image of her in his memories from before the curse, but there were none.

[Harlyn Falkov]

Elysium didn't know why Antares didn't like her male friend, perhaps out of protection and care. "I do not know, James. Ask her, perhaps?" She suggested, distracted by their surroundings. She released James' arm, patting it slightly in a way to remove the possible throb of her tight grip. Just as she was about to say who the girl was, she was stunned as James spoke her name.

~~

Harlyn took in the features of James, unable to keep back the small smile so she hid behind her hair, glancing at the floor nervously. She had attempted to avoid him, not wanting to remember that he couldn't even remember their greater times together; the lone nights in the common room. Then her name, her stupid odd name, left his lips and it sent her whirling. "How do you know my name?" Harlyn said bluntly, afraid of it cracking.

[James Orion Lupin]

James snorted and shook his head. “I am not going anywhere near that girl,” he said, though his tone was obviously amused, “besides, she’s your friend. You should ask her.” James didn’t understand where he knew the girl from, or why he could remember her name. He couldn’t remember meeting her, or spending any time with her. But he could remember the name that went with a pretty but somehow shy face. “I... don’t know,” he said quietly, biting down on his lip as he looked to Elysium for help. His eyes clearly said what’s going on? “I just.. remembered it from somewhere, I guess?”

[Harlyn Falkov]

Elysium rolled her eyes, shoving with her elbow slightly to get towards the conversation with the Mystery girl. "I'll do that now then, you..enjoy.." She said, walking towards Antares before looking over her shoulder sending James a wink and a nod towards Harlyn.

~~

Harlyn's heart, which had been beating fast, came to a sharp halt when he said that he didn't remember. She had hoped he would remember her, just a little bit more than her name. "You...remembered?" Harlyn questioned, her blue eyes shining with tears and she became thankful for long untameable hair that curled into her eyes to hide them. Her mother had said it was her magic, trying to cover the parts that held the most truth; her eyes. "What else do you remember?" Harlyn murmured, refusing to look up at his face.

[James Orion Lupin]

As Elysium walked away, James felt panic build up inside of him. He knew her, even if he didn’t remember the last time they spoke, but he had written enough about her in his notebook that he felt comfortable with her. Safe. Antares sent him a smug smirk as she noticed Elysium approaching her, but he returned his attention to the girl. Harlyn. “Yeah,” he answered, his voice again only just above a whisper. He watched the way that her hair fell into her eyes, and an image formed in his head. The light on her skin was warm, probably from a fire, but all he could see in his mind was dark hair across her eyes. Then she pushed it away, and he could tell that her hazel gaze was smiling, even though he couldn’t see her lips. Reaching out, he pushed the girl’s hair gently aside, and it was those same eyes looking back at him. “I remember..” he trailed off when he realised that he’d just touched the girl, and he dropped his hand quickly and muttered, “I’m sorry.”

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn watched him, having seen the panic in his eyes and she found herself jealous of his connection with Elysium but she brushed it aside, sneaking one more glance at James to see his eyes turn dreamy. "James..?" She whispered, attempting to catch his attention. The Gryffindor girl tensed as his hand raised to move her hair, allowing him to see her watery eyes but the moment he pulled away, she grabbed his hand and placed it upon her cheek. "What is you remember?" Her voice was firm, demanding the truth but her expression stayed gentle and calm.

[James Orion Lupin]

Moistening his lips with his tongue, James hesitated. The more he tried to focus on the memory that had appeared in his mind, the more than it slipped away. Instead he let himself focus on the actual girl in front of him, a look of surprise and wonder was clear on his face as he pulled his hand back to rest against her cheek. He let out a soft breath, letting his thumb gently stroke against her cheek. “Your eyes,” he replied, tilting his head very slightly as he wondered why he was remembering. He hadn’t remembered anything since he had been back at school, and he couldn’t even remember returning. “I remember your eyes,” he said, a little louder this time, though not loud enough for the quickly thinning swarm of students to hear him.

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn took in the expression with delight, her eyes fluttering shut as he stroked her cheek. "You always liked my eyes." She whispered, not even realizing she said it loud. Memories flitted across her mind, a light pink dusting of a blush spread across her cheek as she thought of the person in front of her. Then reality settled in and tears pricked at her eyes once more. This is what she tried to avoid. She moved sharply away, almost knocking into someone in the process. "I'm sorry...I should not have done that. I'm sorry, J."

[James Orion Lupin]

James couldn’t help the small smile that tucked at the corners of his lips at her words. She didn’t seem to be angry with him for talking to her and he was glad because obviously he hadn’t done anything to upset her. “I can see why,” he said, his smile widening. He noticed the blush on her cheeks and he wondered why she would blush. She had beautiful eyes, surely she knew that? The boy’s expression turned to one of confusion and mild concern when he noticed her eyes gloss in tears and he said, “hey.. what’s wrong?” Reaching out for her shoulders, he grabbed her just before she stepped back into someone. “Why are you sorry?” he asked, entirely confused.

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn's gaze was directed at the floor, missing the smile that always set her heart racing whenever she saw it. His concern burned, knowing it was only out of the kindness of his heart, not because he remembered that once upon a time, he cared for her; even if just as a friend. "You do not remember me. I have forced you to touch a cheek you do not remember. You don't remember..me.." Her voice cracked and she bowed her head, a tear slipping down her cheek. "I should've kept walking...Should not have stopped.." Harlyn mumbled to herself, wrapping her arms tight around her lithe form.

[James Orion Lupin]

James was confused. He had already presumed that they knew one another, though whether from a time before or after his return to school he was not sure. But she seemed so sad, and that hurt him more than it should have. The fact that he had not been able to remember anybody at all, and yet had been able to recall her name made him wonder how long they had known each other for. “Harlyn, I’m sorry I don’t remember,” he said, “I want to remember you.” It was true that he wanted to remember everything, but he really wanted to remember the time he had spent with this girl specifically. “I haven’t been able to remember so much about anybody else,” he added, not sure if the girl understood the significance of that to him, “I haven’t been able to remember anything about anybody else..”

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn sighed to herself and she refrained from escaping the situation, running off to forget it ever even happened. She had to remember herself that he couldn't remember her but she got so hopeful hearing her name from his lips. "My name is enough, J. It'll be enough.." Harlyn attempted to reassure herself more than him. Perhaps a fresh start to their friendship where it could actually lead to something instead of her feelings actually not be reciprocated. She looked around to see if anyone was there and took a step back once more so they were at arms length, his scent was lingering in her nose. "Perhaps you're getting your memory back, J and it just happened that I got there at the wrong time so you remembered silly ol' me, ya know?" Harlyn muttered, tucking her hands inside of her pockets as her eyes watered once more, hating how emotional she was being in that moment.

[James Orion Lupin]

James could tell that there was more to her words that he was able to understand, and he wished he knew. Part of him wished of Elysium, because perhaps she would be able to shed some light about what was bothering Harlyn. But she’d abandoned him to go to her friend, and so he was left alone to figure out what was wrong. ‘Are you cold?’ he heard his own voice in his head, ‘do you want me to get you a blanket?’ She was smiling at him and he felt his cheeks warm as she said, ‘the fire is going, J. It’ll be enough.’ Blinking so that he could return his focus to the actual girl in front of him instead of the version of her from his head, he sighed. “The common room,” he said, “you’re a Gryffindor.” Realising that his words made little sense, he added, “did we spend time together often?” He could only hope that she was right and that his memory was returning, but no matter how hard he tried to think of something else.. anything else, it just wasn’t coming to him. “Maybe..” he said, but he couldn’t be sure.

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn watched him, just like she always did and saw his eyes glaze over once more submitting to a memory. Her words were a trigger and she knew it, the memory itself having burned itself into her mind. He went out of his way to care for her, but to her dismay, only as a friend. His sudden words startled her. He was remembering more about her. "Yes..Yes I am." She confirmed for him, tugging at the loose tie around her neck. "Nearly every night, J. Some nights, we were busy with homework so we didn't get to have a chat by the fire. It was a way for us to..unload about the day, complain about professors and even other students. We used to be told off in the morning by dorm mates because we'd stumble blindly into our rooms trying to find our beds in the dead of night." A small laugh left her lips, her hand raising up to cover it as she thought of the past between James and herself. "A few times we didn't even talk. We just sat next to each other, watching the fire and you'd always fret about if I was cold or not."

[James Orion Lupin]

James desperately wished that he could remember more, but no matter how hard he tried to find something he wasn’t able to. His hand instinctively went to the notebook in the pocket of his robes, and he hesitated before dropping the hand back to his side. He felt like writing about this girl would be odd, though he wasn’t sure why. Noticing the way that she toyed with her tie, he rolled his eyes and said with a smile, “I probably should have noticed the colours, but I didn’t.” They spent a lot of time together, then. Maybe that was why he could remember her. He had remembered his family just fine, along with various other parts of his life. It was because they were important things, was the theory. Her words explained what he was certain was a memory, and he offered her a smile. “Would you like to walk with me?” he asked, thinking that perhaps they could head to the common room. A lot of the students had likely already dropped off their school things and were heading back out into the castle and so the room probably wasn’t very packed.

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn begged the world for him to remember something of significance but as usual, she was quite unlucky when it came to getting what she desired. Her eyes flickered to his hands curiously before moving back to his handsome face. "Some people don't notice the colours because they do not think houses are important." She quipped with a shrug. His joking mannerisms; the roll of his eyes and the curve of his smile, was comforting to Harlyn as it was like having a bit of the old J standing in front of her. About to sink into memories, the tips of her fingers still resting on her pink lips, Harlyn was startled out of her mind by his question. "I-I'd like that very much..." She smiled, her faint blush growing a little darker at spending more time with him.

[James Orion Lupin]

James wished he could understand her expressions better. He would give anything to know exactly what she was thinking and how to make the obviously negative things that she was feeling go away. He may not really remember her, but he wanted her to smile. He cared more than he should, and the feeling in his stomach was definitely something that he developed over time. It was like his body knew this girl better than his mind did, and he hated that. “I’ve always believed that houses aren’t important,” he said, knowing that he’d been known to say that exact thing from time to time- at least he had been prior to the curse. When she agreed to walk with him, he grinned and started heading down the corridor. As they neared the end, he could stop himself from wrapping his fingers around her arm so that she would stop walking, and gently turning her to face him. “Harlyn..” he started, before letting out a breath, “were we ever.. together? As in, were we a couple? Because I think I love you, and it feels so weird because my head says I don’t know you, but.. urgh, I sound completely mental, I’m sorry.” He then turned his face away from hers and muttered, "I can't believe I just said that.."

[Harlyn Falkov]

Harlyn knew that look on his face, the constant concern and curiosity in his eyes that showed whenever they spoke. Before he forgot her. His comment about houses made her smile and she nodded in agreement. "I know. You always got so passionate." She said, her tone dreamy as she once again thought of her fond memories with the boy beside her. 

As they began to walk, her hand bumped against his a few times continuously sending shivers down her spine but it was nothing compared to the feeling of his hand wrapping around her arm to grab her attention. She slowly turned to face, her blue eyes wide with confusion but also reassurance that he could say whatever he pleased but it quickly disappeared at his question, wincing. Again as fast as her reassurance disappeared, her fear did as well as he admitted his feelings, even if he didn't remember her. "No no...You don't sound completely mental, James Orion Lupin. You never could. The heart and the mind are two separate things. Your mind is confused but your heart never could be. I..I'm rambling. I'm sorry. What i'm saying is that I completely understand. My mind tells me I shouldn't be doing this but my heart tells me this is the perfect opportunity to tell you that I have and always will be completely in love with you from the moment I met you. I've wanted to tell you for so long but I didn't want to ruin what we had and lose you because that's the last thing i want in the world. I love you, J..Oh my gods, I love you..." Harlyn's eyes overflowed with tears, sliding down her face so gracefully as she looked away from James with a sob. "I love you so much and it's so good to finally say..I used to whisper it to you..When you fell asleep by the fire as that's the only thing I could. Some Gryffindor, I am right? But by gods, I love you! I'd scream it to the world if you wanted to but all I'd have to do is whisper it into your ear as that is what you are to me...you're my entire world..." Harlyn exclaimed, her hands shakily running through her hair.

[James Orion Lupin]

James couldn't believe that this girl was actually talking to him after he had seemed so hesitant before. She'd agreed to take a walk and to discuss their friendship even when he couldn't remember it and he wished that he could, more desperately than he'd wished to remember anything else. Now, he had gone and ruined it with his stupid, impulsive mouth. Maybe if he had just kept walking, and ignored the obnoxious feeling in his stomach it would do away. A little voice in his head told him otherwise, that he had been right in what he had said even if he wished he'd kept it to himself.

As she began to speak, she chewed nervously on his lip, and his fingers slackened on her arm until they were wrapped loosely around her wrist. He didn't want to let go just yet. She spoke with so much conviction in her voice, despite the quiet tone, that he didn't even need to think about believing her. She was being more honest with him than he deserved, after having let himself forget their times together. Harlyn's words made more sense than they should have, about how his heart felt one thing while his mind wouldn't let him remember it. It would explain his underlying trust for Elysium despite being unable to physically remember any time they'd spent with one another. It also explained why he was able to remember Harlyn's name.

Her tears startled him, and he reached out a hand to wipe them away and turn her face back to his. Gently, he guided her to the edge of the corridor, beside a statue, so that nobody could see her emotions so clearly on her face. "You've never told me this before?" he asked quietly, not wanting to break whatever spell had made her open up to him, "I wish I could remember every minute I spent with you, but I can't. Maybe you can help me remember some of the times?" His hand itched to take out his notebook from his robe pocket, but he didn't want to return her attention to the fact that his memory was not intact. It had obviously upset her so much before and he didn't want to make it worse. "Hey, it's alright," he said as he allowed his fingertips to wrap around her's, pulling her hands away from her hair and holding them between the pair, "please don't cry."

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